12/05/2008

Night and Day

So last night was one of those nights that don't come around very often. They don't advertise them in wedding magazines, no one tells you when you get engaged to expect it, and you certainly don't think about it on that big wedding day. But all of my fellow married women can agree that it does happen! Well IT happened last night! What is "IT" you may ask. Well the night that you are yet again reminded that men and women could not be any more different from each other and this fact alon makes cohabiting together feel like torture sometimes! (haha a little harsh...love you babe) But seriously, you ever have those nights where you feel completely not on the same page, but maybe even in two completely different books? Last night was just no fun! The husband and I got into a fight. I started crying( which just always seems to happen, I wish i could get the water works under control) and then the crap hit the fan. After talking through things, we kind of had an epiphany. Maybe it is not an epiphany for others but it was the first time we had really sat down and talked about what we needed from the other person to feel loved. Now me, I am all about you telling me how great I am(haha). But seriously I need lots of encouragement. I need my husband to tell me what it is that he loves about me. It is not enough just to hear that he does...I need to know why!!!! And he could care less why. He told me it doesn't matter. So here I have been the past year and a half trying to love him the way I want to be loved. So I am always telling him what it is about him that I love.....but found out last night that I have been wasting me time! :) Ok not really, I STILL need to do those things. But he really loves it when I respect him. That is when he feels most valued and loved. To quote his words" I don't need you to stroke my back and tell me you love me. I need you to say"You have what it takes and I will follow you wherever you lead me." ( Actually very poetic and true words-good job babe) So now I know and he knows and hopefully we can move towards understanding how to fulfill the other one a little bit better! A good lesson to learn.....but not a very fun process!! So honey if you are reading this " Know that you DO have what it takes and I WILL follow you to the ends of the earth...no questions asked". And for any of you reading....leave a comment...you know I love to hear why you love me!! Haha only teasing! :)

2 comments:

Cara said...

you are not alone!!! (as you stated) and sadly, it will happen more often than you'd like it to happen. i wish just one convo or night like that could take care of it forever! :)

The Pettijohn's said...

What a great post! you are NOT alone! This is what marriage is really about, it's work...a whole lot of it, in fact! It is though, the most rewarding act to know that daily you are becoming closer to your husband with every conversation like that, and the little things you share as husband and wife.

It only makes us stronger!!

To your post: Amen sister!!